Sunday Morning

What a week!

Monday I GOT MY CAR!!!!! I feel like such a princess driving that car. The best part about it, is it's mine. I realized after getting that car that for the next few years the most important thing is me. I'm making it a priority that before I start a life with someone else, I have to have everything for myself and I want to make sure that I leave time to enjoy it. I've seen too many women go from having nothing to everything being "ours" instead of "mine", and I don't want that. Wednesday, I met up with an old friend and I had about a million and one thoughts going through my head the whole time. One thing he said to me that I could not agree more with, was that we jumped head first into our relationship. We had known each other in another life and I guess because of our history, I felt that there was no need to "get to know each other" or be friends for a while. But we are definitely not the same people today that we were back then. I'm a HUGE believer in God's will, and if it's meant to be it will be. There was never a bad moment between us and that's probably the hardest part about starting completely over and having a strictly platonic relationship. We both have a lot of personal things that need to be fixed before the two of us can go any further in life as a couple and actually have a healthy and successful relationship. All I can do is pray about it. I watched Waiting to Exhale this weekend and after years of seeing that movie over 100 times I finally get it. The one thing I love about that movie is in spite of the bullshit in their relationships they still remained strong women who depended on the foundation of their friendship with one another to get through hard times. One of the character's, Bernadine, was left after 11 years of marriage for another woman. The worst part for her was that she "didn't have a plan B". Her marriage was her life, her backbone and while no one enters a marriage expecting it to fail, too many women realize when it's too late that they don't know anything but their life at home. This goes back to what I said earlier about having my own. I'd love to get married and have a family, but I need to know for my own satisfaction that if things don't work out, I'll be just fine on my own. The one thing I loved about that movie was the closeness the 4 women had. I can only hope that as me and my girls get older and life changes we'll always look to each other for love and comfort. Because with your girls, you know it's always genuine.