Am I Wrong?

Is it wrong to ask God to give you another chance with someone? I hate to continue dwelling on a subject as shallow as a relationship, but I haven't felt this discouraged since I lost my boyfriend, DJ, at the tender age of 18. I remember it as vividly as the days it was taking place...

He and I met through a mutual "friend" when I was a 17 year old high school senior. He was instantly attracted to me, but being the superficial stuck up snob I was back then, I couldn't see past his raggedy tennis shoes and his lack of style. After several months of trying to get to know me, he'd finally had it with me ignoring him and let me have via text message. I felt bad because even though I didn't like the kid, I still had somewhat of a conscience and didn't want to hurt his feelings. So I made up the excuse that I was just oh-so-busy with school work and end of the semester papers, and it was nothing personal. My parents began going through some hard times in their relationship and one night my mom told me to just get out of the house for a little while. So I dressed myself up, called everybody I knew and was friends with, but only 2 people could and would make time for me: good ol' Yasmeyn, and DJ. It was at that point something in me clicked. He was there for me when hardly no one else was. So...I fell. I fell fast and hard.

4 months later, he decided that it was in his best interest to see if "with me is where he really wanted to be, or with her is where he belonged". I remember not hardly being able to do anything but cry. Cry, cry, cry. It was terrible. I'd be at work crying. I'd be at school crying. I'd be in the bed attempting to get some sleep crying. I was a mess! I never got over it, but I guess I didn't have to because a month later we were back together. I felt...complete again. Wow. 18 years old, feeling "complete" because a hormonal 19 year old boy chose her over his Wal-Mart co-worker. The crazy thing about that situation is, 2-3 years later, he moves to the same city she was from and ultimately moved back to, and they rekindled what I had apparently gotten in the way of. Unfortunately, she had not gotten over what he, along with other men in her past, had done to hurt her emotionally and she ended their relationship. She was stupid for that one. She gave up a good one :-/

As crazy, and even down right stupid as I feel for saying this, something, that voice, is telling me that it's not over. I'm probably riding a cloud made up of a plethora of false sense of hope, but truthfully it gives me a sense of relief and peace of mind. Another thing that makes me feel differently about this one, is the fact that I NEVER want to give relationships a chance. I don't have any fear of commitment and I don't get bored easily, I just don't see any point in continuing with someone who doesn't make me happy. I often look into the future with every single guy that I begin getting to know. If I can't see him being a permanent fixture in the equation whether it be because he's selfish, a liar, has a short temper or just trifling, I don't bother giving him a chance. But this one...he's special. I feel like a fool for being this head over heels for someone who for the past week has dropped off the face of the earth.

So really, is it wrong to pray to God to give you another chance with someone? Is that "too shallow"? We all need love, and after a year with no companionship, I honestly don't think it's too much to ask...