Thus far, it has been an uninteresting weekend with rather interesting events.
Friday was supposed to be a "date night" for me. Nothing major--dinner and a movie. The night before, I was having a casual conversation with the guy I was planning on going out with, and I casually asked him a rather personal question. Before I reveal the question, I would like to note that I did ask him to not take it the wrong way because some people (especially men) get rather defensive when someone asks certain things that they feel is either personal or irrelevant. Being that we were on the subject of work, I asked him what his salary was. Now before anybody freaks out or forms an opinion, I'd like to say that in my defense I did not ask him how much money he brought home on his paycheck. I probably should have worded it differently and asked what I really meant which was "how much does someone make doing what you do?" The night we were supposed to go out, he calls me and tells me, in not so many words, that he got the impression that I was after him for his money. I will admit that since I am getting older and trying to take dating a tad bit more seriously, a man's establishment is important to me. That does not necessarily mean that I'm concerned with whether or not he brings home over $50,000.00 a year. My dad doesn't make that much, and my mom substantially earns at least $15,000.00 more than he does, but it has never made a difference to her. Being that my mom has never been concerned with anything other than a man having a job, she has not raised me to rely on the financial security of a man for my well being. For the record (and yes I'm bragging) I work Mon-Fri earning a decent amount of money that allows me to pay for my own brand new vehicle, I pay for my own tuition as well as books, I pay my own cell phone bill (which is NOT cheap), and anything else that I need or want on a regular basis. Oh yeah, and I'm kid free. I do NOT need a man for anything other than company, comfort and a good lay every now and then. I know that some people may say that there has to be some truth behind it if I'm getting so defensive, but honestly, I strongly dislike women who look to a man for financial security. I take a great deal of pride in everything that I do independently and the last thing I want is for someone to put me in a category with gold-diggers. But I'm through explaining myself...
On a lighter note I have my first lab exam tomorrow and I'm shittin' bricks. I've been studying everyday for the past couple of weeks but I still don't feel fully prepared for it. I know that a lot of it is anxiety because the professor is basically throwing us to the wolves, but regardless of how well I do or don't do I'll know what to expect the next time and hopefully I won't stress as much.
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I don't think you were wrong in asking the guy about his salary. Of course you want to know that he has a job, etc. But it also could've been how you worded the statement. Maybe it would've been better to bring it up in later months.
However, if you are taking care of yourself, why would he think that you are after him for his money? If anything, he should want to know that you are independent & do not want to depend entirely on him.
Just keep doing you & God will work the rest out.
I'll continue to check your posts :)
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